I don't know when it began. No one gave me one of those clocks that counts down the time you have left based on life expectancy. I think Sharper Image sold them. I wonder if they had one that foresaw their demise and rebirth in 2008.
I think the lace curtain project solidified the feeling but it had been brewing inside of me for some time before that. I looked at the lace one day and thought if I didn't do it now it probably wasn't going to get done. There's no morose feeling, no depressing dread. Just a quiet realization that that count down click is ticking and I probably will not live forever.
Actually, it is having a very good affect on my life. I'm looking at things much more realistically. I've thrown away some "future project" clutter that just wasn't going to happen. The "stencil vines on your kitchen walls" is a good example. I did keep all of the acrylic paint that came in the box. Can always use it before it dries out and shrivels up. Is there an an analogy there?
I'm working on an art project that I started about ten years ago. It has been languishing in a corner gathering dust all this time. I don't feel the burden of completing it. Rather, I am excited to see how it comes out. I've cut off some long pants that were waiting to be made into summer (year round for us) shorts. And I threw away a couple dresses that I'm not going to have occasion to wear. And this afternoon I cleaned out my knife drawer which had way too many knives in it.
I never believed in time travel or the Dorian Grey deal with the devil. I would never have wanted to live it all over again like in Damn Yankees. I just didn't think about it. Procrastination was easy for me, kind of second nature. Where was this paradigm for punctuality when I was working and could have used it?
I haven't looked...I don't think an expiration date has appeared on the bottom of my foot...like the woman in the American Cancer Center ad jokes about. But if a date has appeared, I hope it is just a suggested Best if Used By date, rather than a formal Expires on ... date like a short term CVS coupon.
I think the lace curtain project solidified the feeling but it had been brewing inside of me for some time before that. I looked at the lace one day and thought if I didn't do it now it probably wasn't going to get done. There's no morose feeling, no depressing dread. Just a quiet realization that that count down click is ticking and I probably will not live forever.
Actually, it is having a very good affect on my life. I'm looking at things much more realistically. I've thrown away some "future project" clutter that just wasn't going to happen. The "stencil vines on your kitchen walls" is a good example. I did keep all of the acrylic paint that came in the box. Can always use it before it dries out and shrivels up. Is there an an analogy there?
I'm working on an art project that I started about ten years ago. It has been languishing in a corner gathering dust all this time. I don't feel the burden of completing it. Rather, I am excited to see how it comes out. I've cut off some long pants that were waiting to be made into summer (year round for us) shorts. And I threw away a couple dresses that I'm not going to have occasion to wear. And this afternoon I cleaned out my knife drawer which had way too many knives in it.
I never believed in time travel or the Dorian Grey deal with the devil. I would never have wanted to live it all over again like in Damn Yankees. I just didn't think about it. Procrastination was easy for me, kind of second nature. Where was this paradigm for punctuality when I was working and could have used it?
I haven't looked...I don't think an expiration date has appeared on the bottom of my foot...like the woman in the American Cancer Center ad jokes about. But if a date has appeared, I hope it is just a suggested Best if Used By date, rather than a formal Expires on ... date like a short term CVS coupon.
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